Most of us have an inner vision of who we think we are and how we
assume we appear to others. Although the opinions of others should be
taken in healthy doses, it is important that we’re not completely
clueless to the way we come across to others. Why?
How Others See You Affects Your Pay, Your Promotions, and Your Connections
People like to categorize. Either intentionally or unintentionally,
we are placed in groups and segregated in other’s minds. The groups can
range widely, but they can look something like this:
- Good communicators
- Skilled management
- Willing to learn
- Proactive
- Committed to excellence
That’s the positive side. Unfortunately, we’re not all in that group. Here’s a few more:
- Interruptive
- Prideful
- Unbending
- Forceful
- Long winded
What if you fall into one of the second categories? Then what?
The truth of the matter is, no one is perfect and any one of us could
(and probably do) fall into more than one category. Someone may think
we’re a great communicator, but also long winded. That’s not a good
thing. So, we know how to get our point across, but we don’t know when
to stop talking. Yikes.
These little things that obviously need a bit of adjusting can affect
our relationships, jobs, promotions, and so much more. A Harvard
Business Review article recently told the story of one modest and caring
executive who was shocked to learn (after speaking with a personal
coach who examined his professional relationships) that his habit of
interrupting others led people to view him as haughty and arrogant,
which is actually the opposite of who he really is. It affected many of
the decisions others made about him.
Why Are We Delusional?
It’s pretty easy to figure out why we might be so off base with our
thoughts on the way others view us. Often, employees (or anyone we may
outrank for the time being) put on a happy face and put up with us,
regardless of the way we behave. After all, who wants to jeopardize
their future?
Unfortunately, this just compounds the problem. Often, we use the
false approval of others to cancel out the clear messages our spouse,
children, or leaders are trying to give us.
So, how do we renew our sense of awareness, and get that honest
feedback that will help us to become the best possible version of
ourselves?
Discovering Your Personal Brand
How others view you is part of your personal brand. It’s not that
difficult to discover how other’s see you. The first step involves a
willingness to hear what we may have been denying, and the decision to
work on and improve.
- Ask Questions – Part of reinventing yourself involves the
discovery process. Approach a few friends and colleagues who are gifted
at this sort of thing (believe me, they’re out there) and be honest. Let
them know that you are on a quest for self improvement and ask them to
write down your top 5 improvement areas. You could even have them do so
anonymously.
- Hold a Focus Group – If you have a strong online presence,
set up a questionnaire. Ask individuals from all walks of life and those
who have a wide variety of contact with you to rate your strengths and
pinpoint at least 2 of your weaknesses. Take every bit of feedback to
heart. Our biggest mistakes often come from dismissing suggestions over
and over again because we don’t think they pertain to us, when they
really do.
- Send Out Customer Satisfaction Surveys – Often we like to
hide behind our brand or our company. It makes it easier to accept
criticism. But what if we simply put ourselves out there and asked our
customers and clients how they felt we were doing, as well as inviting
pointers on what to improve. If you cringed at the very thought of this,
the simple truth is that you’re probably living at some level of denial
about yourself, your treatment of others or the excellence in which you
run your business.
I hope this article was helpful. As mentioned, we don’t have to allow
ourselves to be brutally shredded by others, but asking for honest and
constructive opinions can actually prevent you from derailing your
entire career, relationships and more, –if you’re willing to take the
advice!
Side note:
If you’re an employer or business owner looking to take your company
to the next level and are in need of additional staff, we at HH Staffing
Services invite you to allow us to be a part of your team.
With skilled employees in Tampa, Bradenton, Fort Lauderdale, Clearwater
and Orlando, we will help streamline your business by allowing you to
do what you do best (run your business) while we do what we do best,
provide you with the right staff to make you shine! Give us a call
today. We promise to provide you with a remarkable experience!